The Squander Bureau Return to the bad decisions →

Policy file 02 · Tiny print, normal size

Terms of Service

Effective July 22, 2026 · Preview draft

Current status

This site is a non-transactional preview. No checkout is connected, no purchase can be completed, and the simulated certificate has no monetary or official value.

The proposed service

The Squander Bureau is an entertainment service that creates personalized digital artifacts commemorating an intentionally unnecessary purchase. Each eventual paid tier must display its exact price and included deliverables before checkout. It is not a government agency, charity, bank, investment service, gambling service, prize promotion, stored-value program, or financial advisor. The seals are decorative. The underclerk is fictional.

Eligibility and sound judgment

A live purchaser must be at least 18 years old and legally able to enter a contract. Do not purchase if doing so would interfere with housing, food, bills, debt payments, savings obligations, or other essentials. Nothing on the site is meant to pressure or shame someone into spending. Leaving without buying remains the most financially efficient tier.

Customer content

Names, aliases, dedications, and other submitted text must not violate law or another person's rights. They must not contain sensitive personal information, harassment, threats, hate, sexual content involving minors, instructions for wrongdoing, impersonation, or material that the customer lacks permission to use. The Bureau may reject or remove material that violates these rules and will define the resulting refund treatment before launch.

Digital artifacts and public display

The buyer receives the digital deliverables described for the purchased tier. A public registry entry will be optional. Any reference to a “permanent” or “historic” monument is comedic language, not a promise that hosting will continue forever. Production terms will describe the supported access period, download options, license, reasonable content corrections, and what happens if the service closes.

Payments and prohibited expectations

Live payment terms will identify the merchant, currency, processor, statement description, taxes if applicable, and product identity. A purchase does not provide an investment return, financial instrument, prize, lottery entry, transferable credit, charitable receipt, government recognition, or guaranteed social admiration. Duplicate charges and unauthorized transactions will be investigated promptly through the published support process.

Changes before launch

This preview draft is not the final commerce agreement. The Bureau will complete ownership details, contact information, jurisdiction, dispute language, service availability, intellectual-property terms, and limitation provisions before accepting money. Material changes will be dated and published here. Showcase questions can be sent to hello@corycape.com.